My sharing battery has officially died out; and I am afraid it won't recharge for a very long time. (perhaps it won't ever recharge, but we shall see) For days and days I have tried to think of something important, something insightful, something meaningful to share, and I have nothing. Absolutely nothing.
And I just don't feel excited anymore. With life in general and with Stories.Not a blog. I have run out of things to say; of things to share, and although a big part of me feels relieved to have reached this point I really miss waking up with the desire to spend hours working and writing for this humble yet currently abandoned Not a blog.
I will officially take a month-long “hiatus” to refocus (and recharge?). On both Not a blog. and on my Endeavor, which I have also abandoned. I need it. I need to not be here—at least for a while—without feeling guilty.
I will endeavor to be back September 1st; but no guarantees will be (officially) made (to either myself or the few souls to happen to read this). I need time to do a lot of stupid yet important stuff, and at this junction in time Stories.Not a blog. is (unfortunately, regrettably) getting in the way. Perhaps if and/or when I do return I will have more of my stories written down, and an interesting or insightful or meaningful thing (or two) to share.
I started eating mushrooms recently and have only committed myself to one species (portobello mushrooms) in particular because of an awful story I was fed as a child.
When I was a toddler a family member told me that mushrooms were grown inside used diapers. That's it. That's the story. For 20+ years I've avoided eating mushrooms because a family member scared me into believing that all mushrooms were grown inside dirty, soiled, shit-stained, piss-filled, heavy, wet, and nasty diapers.
As I grew I (obviously) realized this family member had (obviously) lied, but guess what, Stranger? Out of curiosity one day I “Googled It” and won't you fucking believe it, some scientists in MexicoACTUALLY did it. They grew diapers inside dirty, soiled, shit-stained, piss-filled, heavy, wet and nasty diapers.
The world is fucking crazy.
Note: I know ABCMouseNews isn't too reliable of a source for some, but it was the best I could find. A simpleMushroom Diaperssearch on Google will give you a bunch of articles if you're interested.
A few days ago, for no particular reason, R. and I watched ALL 3 Divergent movies. In order. Without skipping around (I usually skip around when I watch movies; whether I've seen them before or not unless the movie is somehow TOO GOOD to skip (which is exceedingly rare)) and without any breaks in between.
It was a horrible (awful, excruciating, agonizing, soul-destroying) experience and unless I am binge watching the LOTR trilogy again I will NEVER do something like this (again!). Well, there might be exceptions in the future, but they will be VERY rare and sporadic and I will take appropriate breaks and skip around (just a little bit) when absolutely necessary.
We started watching around 6:30PM (Friday, July 16th) and finished around 12:48am (Saturday, July 17th).
I'm not updating Stories.Not a blog. as much as I used to because I'm scared of being a nuisance (to you) (perhaps I'll expand more on this later?). I know you can't see or hear me (heck, you don't even know who I am and you can choose not to read SNAB if you'd like) but I am so afraid of you (stranger) thinking I'm an annoyance or nuisance of any kind.
I thought I wasn't writing/updating due to laziness, but that's not the case. After the “poems” I wrote a while ago I've felt “off” and being “sick” for several weeks made it worse. Any creativity I had is now gone and I don't know what else to say except sorry. I still have things to finish, but I don't know when that'll be. Hopefully something interesting will sprout up soon.
I am having a mid-midlife crisis. I have been desperately looking for this stupid hamburger from my childhood and I CANNOT FIND IT ANYWHERE. Well, I can cause’ I managed to find a picture, but I mean I can’t find anywhere to purchase it. I used to buy these a lot as a kid and its been over a decade since my lips have tasted their marshmallow-y goodness.
I hate not updating SNAB often, but these past three weeks have been dreadful. I was “sick” for two of them, and this week I've been struggling. In my previous post I said I was excited to get back to my normal activities, but anxiety, a dear old friend of mine, has been making the rounds; which means I haven't been able to do anything productive.
I have two stories semi-ready, though. I will try my hardest to complete them soon and then they'll be up. In the meantime I'm gonna get back to working on my Endeavor and trying to re-establish a somewhat normal sleep schedule.
The first part of the afternoon after getting the vaccine went by smoothly. I had lots of energy and felt good. Around 8PM, however, things started to change. I began to feel EXTREMELY TIRED and my head began to feel as if it had been stuffed inside a box with safety packaging and bubble wrap. Everything felt tight and I began to feel a little bit disoriented.
After eating a light meal I went to bed and then BOOM! The real pain and misery began.
My sister graduated from high school last week. The ceremony was long; full of unnecessary musical breaks and arduous speeches, but I was so happy to be there. She looked cute as a button getting her diploma AND she graduated summa cum laude.